Growing together

08Mar09

I have never been comfortable with change.  It wasn’t something I hated in the least when it came to new furniture or changing rooms.  It has always been in the big things, like my way of life.  Moving away from home for school was tough but I managed.  I created a routine that was similar to living with my parents and visited them often.  After 2 years though, or less, I ended up moving back home and it felt so comfortable and blissful to be back.

I fell back into my old routines and was surrounded by those I love and know well.  Then after meeting M, that changed again.  I moved away.  I started to make my own routines again in a new place, but this was different.  I was living with someone, a strong headed someone, just like me.  We clash, a lot.  We each want things our way.  However, with the past year we have both learned we have to give.  We are forming our own routine that I am finding comfort in.  I feel at home, and at peace, here now.  This is my safe place.

It took a lot longer than I would have liked to get to this place but I am happy I have.  The defining moment was my parents visiting this weekend.  Being around them always made me feel safe and at home.  Now this visit has been different.  I sat there in the living room thinking how I love them and miss them and am so glad they are visiting, but it would be better with M.  I mean that I would prefer M here and it being a normal weekend over living with my parents again.  I love them and want them to always visit, but I am always going to find things comfortable and normal with M next to me. 

I am so glad to finally be where I needed to be.

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